‘Shenanigans’ on you Bomber

There’s something about Mark Thompson’s last few press conferences that has me a little worried. As a bloke who has been the football version of Bill Lawry (the corpse with pads), he’s suddenly stopped playing the straight bat and started flirting with cheeky dabs behind square and now full-blooded heaves to Cow Corner.

“Collingwood are jealous of our success” or my favourite “I’m SURE they PROBABLY hate us.” Sorry Mr Thompson, where is all this coming from? Why are you suddenly playing the man and not the ball? Putting your focus on mind games and not waiting for your team of champions to do their talking with the ball is very un-Bomber.
I’m calling ‘Shenanigans’.

Call me a skeptic. Call me hopeful or desperate. But I get the distinct feeling that he’s fumbling around in the darkness for excuses. Bomber’s main problem is, he hasn’t got any.

Let’s take a look at the easy avenues to goal when you’re after an excuse, shall we?

Injuries.

Yes, Max Rooke not being right is a loss. But he’s been a loss all year. So if you haven’t found a way to cope with that loss, I’m sorry but we’re not accepting “The dog ate my defensive forward” today. Varcoe, in all seriousness, will be missed. Travis has been a revelation this year as a midfield stopgap and a speedy goalsnea…oh… What? Travis is fine? It’s Lloyd Varcoe that’s on the injury list. Good old, Frank Varcoe. Leading possession winner Jimmy Varcoe. I’m sure they’ll miss Stevie Varcoe’s game of experience. I think there’s someone else on the injury list but I can’t remember his name either. Pretty sure Bomber wouldn’t know him from a bar of soap too.

A hard run in.

Geelong’s last three games have been hosting West Coast at home, St Kilda at home and Freo at home. They made it look like beating the wooden spooners was a tough gig. They should have beaten St Kilda in week one (irrespective of the umpires – you can’t miss seven shots at goal in a final quarter and expect people to feel sorry for you) despite the fact half the team didn’t show up in the first half. And the Fremantle Witches Hats did a wonderful impression of a soccer team last week. So if anything, you could argue that the Cats are underdone, having only played two quarters of high intensity football in the last three weeks.

Inexperience.

Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha.

Pressure.

Unfortunately, Mr Thompson played that card a bit too early. See, apparently there’s no pressure on Geelong at all. There used to be. You know, in like 2007. But not now. Apparently, bowing out in a prelim would be a perfectly acceptable soft closure to Geelong’s premiership window. And the fans would gracefully accept losing to the side they’ve metronomically thumped in the corresponding game twice in the last three years.

Nothing to play for (a la “it’s round 22 and we’re a game and a half clear on top).

This is a final so that’s a moot point. But the Cats are playing for something greater than that. They’re playing for a signature. Prove they, as a team, can still mix it with the up and coming teams and Gary Jr’s pen might just make the right kind of moves on their bit of paper. They’ve already got his ex back in the frame. They just need his team mates to convince him they’ve got another few years left at the top.

Mind you, the biggest barometer of this will be Mr Mooney. He’s still seething about his blatant push in the back against poor little James Gwilt in the Qualifying Final. If the Cats look like they’re on their way out in the last quarter and he does something fist-tacularly stupid, then my tip is the baldy man heads north.

If the coach can’t get his side up for a Preliminary final against the minor Premiers, then he will need a good excuse or two. Unfortunately for Mark Thompson, none of the above will cut the mustard.

Comments

  1. John Butler says:

    El Freeako

    It’s always worth noting when experienced hands depart from long held practice.

    At the very least, it tells you something’s got them thinking.

  2. I doubt Collingwood are going to be lulled into a false sense of security before facing a full-strength Geelong side. The only question that truly needs answering is how the hell am I going to be able to leave work at 4pm to get there in time to get a decent seat?

  3. Mooney’s not seething nearly as much as Collingwood regarding the push in the back.

    “Ground Hog Day” must be very frustrating from within.

  4. I’ll be honest – as a Cats supporter, the second I saw the words “jealous”, “hate” and “pressue”, I conceded we are probably going to get thumped on Friday night.

    Naturally, I hope and dream we can win, but this does not bode well.

    Previous instances of “mind games”:

    Choko Williams, 2007: Port went down by 119 points.
    Mick Malthouse, 2009: Pies went down by 73 points.

    Please, please, PLEASE Thompson: recapture your form from 2007-2009!!!!!!

  5. pressure*

  6. Sydney Malakellis says:

    Bomber has got enough runs on the board to try these mind games. Port in 2007 had achieved nothing. Collingwood of 2009- nothing. I think Bomber knows what I’m doing. At least, I bloody well hope so!

  7. Sydney Malakellis says:

    I mean “what he’s doing”. Clearly, I don’t know what I’m doing!

  8. Dave Latham says:

    I think it’s time to replace Bomber’s swivel seat with a camode. A bed at Dafodil Meadows awaits.

  9. chris murray says:

    Hey,
    just set aside your subscription for next year and pay up in good faith. Thats al it is A leap of faith .
    Go Cats.

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