Is there Life on Mars?

This AFL season is all getting too surreal.  First tanking, then peptides.  Now there are 15,000 less fans wanting to see a Geelong-Fremantle final than attended last year.  So the game has had to be shifted to Corio Bay, to find a stadium where there won’t be empty seats.  I would have thought an extra 10,000 would attend to escape the election.

Houston we have a (credibility) problem.  Is it that the drugs don’t work, or that AFL Headquarters has been snorting the leftovers from the Evidence Room?  When the going gets weird, the weird get going.

David Bowie saw this all coming 42 years ago when he penned this guide to AFL 2013 and the Geelong-Dockers game we will all be watching on TV:

“It’s a god-awful small affair
To the girl with the purple hair
But her mummy is yelling “No”
And her daddy has told her to go

But her friend is nowhere to be seen
Now she walks through her sunken dream
To the seat with the clearest view
And she’s hooked to the silver screen

But the film is a saddening bore
For she’s lived it ten times or more
She could spit in the eyes of fools
As they ask her to focus on

Sailors fighting in the dance hall
Oh man! Look at those cavemen go
It’s the freakiest show

Take a look at the Lawman
Beating up the wrong guy
Oh man! Wonder if he’ll ever know
He’s in the best selling show
Is there life on Mars?

It’s on the AFL’s tortured brow
That Mickey Mouse has grown up a cow
Now the workers have struck for fame
‘Cause peptide’s on sale again

See the mice in their million hordes
From Corio to the Norfolk Broads
Rule Gieschenia is out of bounds
To my mother, my dog, and clowns

But the film is a saddening bore
‘Cause I wrote it ten times or more
It’s about to be writ again
As I ask you to focus on

Sailors fighting in the dance hall
Oh man! Look at those cavemen go
It’s the freakiest show

Take a look at the Lawman
Beating up the wrong guy
Oh man! Wonder if he’ll ever know
He’s in the best selling show
Is there life on Mars?”

 

Comments

  1. PB – I’m just loving this angst from the West!

  2. The Rules Committee has ‘Hunky Dory’ on high rotation – “ch-ch-ch-changes”

  3. If Geelong can have a home final at what is basically a suburban ground (albeit in a provincial city) can The Pies play Port at Victoria Park?

  4. Looks like I went a day early with this one. I just opened the Age website and the top headline was:
    “AFL Boss sorry for burnt dwarf laughing fit”.
    When the going gets weird……………….
    I think the Great Helmsman no longer has control of his multiple personalities – Statesman; Social Reformer; Guardian of Values and Morals; Business Tycoon; Vaudeville Performer. Like KRudd and Bruce he no longer understands being himself; it is himself being the image of the sort of self he thinks is required at the current moment.
    “Take a look at the Lawman
    Beating up the wrong guy
    Oh man! Wonder if he’ll ever know
    He’s in the best selling show
    Is there life on Mars?”

  5. Mark 'Swish' Schwerdt says:

    That weren’t no A.D. that was hazy cosmic jive

Leave a Comment

*