1986 – A Year With The Blacks Round 10: Revolutionary

 

 

Gordon's stipend has just come through

 

It’s been a fruitful week. The first progress payment for my sesquicentennial literary grant has just arrived. I’m not sure what to do with the $75, I can’t decide between a slap up dinner at the Revolving Restaurant or the Buffalo across the road. We are so spoilt for choice, but in view of the latter’s role in our great state’s history, it will be the Buffalo for me. In fact I can see myself eating there on a regular basis for decades to come. Mark my words.

It revolves, the food must be good

It revolves, so the food must be good

 

Voted #1 replica ship restaurant in Glenelg two months running

Voted #1 replica ship restaurant in Glenelg two months running

 

Still, I can’t believe that

a) I’m getting paid to follow the Blacks throughout 1986

b) Anyone would want to read about it

c) Bob Neil isn’t Premier

 

Knows his way around a half back line and a keg.

Knows his way around a half back line and a keg

For a pretty ordinary player, Bob Neil is getting a bit of attention around the club, but it is probably another one of those ridiculous undergraduate humor things like Prosh, shopping trolleys in the Torrens and jazz cigarettes, that look funny at the time, but are forgotten about a year or two down the track.

They are starting to sing silly songs at Hold Your Bowlies, but those slothful Blacks youth don’t even bother with proper lyrics.

Take this one for example, sung to the tune of our national anthem (Advance Australia Fair that is, not C’mon Aussie C’mon)

Bob Neil Bob Neil Bob Neil Bob Neil

Bob Neil Bob Neil Bob Neil

Bob Neil Bob Neil

Bob Neil Bob Neil

Bob Neil Bob Neil Bob Neil

etc

He even gets a mention in the club song, sung to the tune of California, Here I Come

We’re the mighty Uni team

By far the best you’ve ever seen

With talent, and teamwork, we always combine

And when we, get tired, Sandy gives us ginger wine

But we’re the fittest team you know

And Bob Neil is a legend so

Open up those kegs of beer

Cause we’ll win the flag this year

The Blacks, the Blacks, the Blacks are fit

The Blacks, the Blacks, the Blacks suck piss!

Disgraceful. I prefer that one sung by Salisbury North about having whiskers on your downstairs parts, but each to their own I suppose. Still, it’s hardly likely to take off around the globe, is it? If they are looking for a cult figure, I’d be trying Steve O’Loughlin or Piggy Muldoon. Now they’re cult material.

 

June 21st 1986 – Round 10

A1 – Griff’s Grapejuice Guzzlers

Adelaide Uni 24.14 def P.A.O.C 10.16 (Uni Oval)

Goalkickers: Tasker 7, T Hancock 4, Hall 3, Antonello 2, Eckert 2, Bland, Ewers, Griffen, Huston, Kenny, Schulz

Best Players: Whaley, A Parker, Antonello, Williams, Kenny, Miller-Smith

I’m not sure whether it smacked of desperation or the opportunity for a few cheap kicks, but the aging coach found a spot for himself on the Uni Oval flank in the Ones again this week. The Tarnished Spooners were always going to struggle against the powerhouse of manly amateur athletes being assembled on the banks of the Torrens. No, no, I mean further downstream from the footbridge. No sign of that Dadds bloke, I think he’s fired his best shot already this season. Paul Whaley might just have a future in footy if he sticks at it, based on today’s efforts.

Next week’s game behind the ABC Collinswood studios against Broadview will help decide whether the A1s are worthy finals contenders.

A8 – Glamour Side

Adelaide Uni 7.18 def West Croydon 5.10 (Fawk Reserve, Athol Park)

Goalkickers: Drummond 2, Burfield, Flavel, Kidd, Maddern, Raschella

Best Players: Horne, Bassanese, C Watson, Flavel, Dutschke, Raschella

I got lost trying to find Fark Park, thinking that Hanson Road was near the Chick’s Charcoal Chicken Place. The game itself was a shocker to watch, but the first of the horror run home’s North West suburbs away games was in the bank.

Coach’s Notes – It has not been a good week – the Basket has a brain scan, Coleman has his shabby plastic surgery, the Experiment breaks down at practice (Jamie Horne was nearest to the correct time on the night – 3 minutes), we play the Cordon Bleu away. Fortunately Papa Raschella is stimulated by all the horror around him and plays brilliantly while Irish Stewart perfects what is later to become an art form – the most dreadful kick for goal. Again the Uni heart muscle holds. It is a miracle and as a result, hope is held out that The Jerk (Darren Graetz) will one day grow into a nice boy.

A9 – Sty Council

Adelaide Uni 16.15 def St Dominics 6.11 (Park 9)

Goalkickers: Fahey 5, Leyland 4, Altmann 2, Priest 2, Young 2, Schwerdt

Best Players: Young, Fahey, Thomson, Fulwood, Leyland, Carey

Sty Fahey - He's cleaned up his act

Sty Fahey – He’s cleaned up his act

Pee Wee Taylor’s season ending knee injury a few weeks back meant that coach Andy ‘Sty’ Fahey decided to lurk in the goal square from now on take on the burden of supplying the bulk of his team’s score in front of the big sticks. It helped that Sty’s dad was the team appointed goal umpire, a duty that he cheated like buggery in diligently performed week in week out.

Pattison brothers Paul and Greg went one better and supplied their father Reg as assistant coach. He was Sty’s eyes, ears and occasionally tongue on the sidelines with his vast collection of turtleneck jumpers in various shades of mission brown invariably capped off with a trendy three quarter length leather jacket. If you remember Haydn Bunton or Bob Hammond’s get up in their coaching days of the recent 70s, you’ve nailed Reg’s dress style. He had a sharp eye for a shrewd tactical positional change, such as swapping John Goodwin and Simon Thomson to the opposite wings or telling Swish to keep away from the footballers.

For some reason Dr Dart Altmann played for the Council today, his only appearance in the club’s feature sides for 1986. Owen ‘Flounder’ Young cruelled the hopes of the Catholic Public Servants offered up by Blackfriars Lite and Mike ‘British’ Leyland triumphed in the forward line. Thommo, Flop and Solomons were not the puppet show supported by Spinal Tap, rather they were three of the better Blacks today.

Gordon ‘Iron Guts’ Agars

About Mark 'Swish' Schwerdt

Saw my first SANFL game in 1967 - Dogs v Peckers. Have only ever seen the Dogs win 1 final in the flesh (1972 1st Semi) Mediocre forward pocket for the AUFC Blacks (1982-89) Life member - Ormond Netball Club -That's me on the right

Comments

  1. Brilliant. What characters, Bob Neil, Sty Fahey, Where are they now!

  2. Wonderful Swish. 1986 was the Buffalo’s best year. Once we took our then six year old nephew to its family dinner and he declared it, “The best buffalo restaurant he’s ever been to.”

    Agreed, Bob Hammond in the 1970’s was a dapper sight.

  3. Rulebook says:

    Sensational as always Swish loved the Bob Neil cult line and re Bob Hammond especially

  4. Haha “telling Swish to keep away from the footballers”. Whaddya mean 6% “where are they now”? Bob can be seen most Saturday home games in the long room and at the various Blacks’ functions where he will still happily sign a footy or grimace for a photo. I introduced young Jacko Dearing to Bob at the long lunch recently. Jacko had been convinced that Bob was a mere figment. What a thrill. Never mind that Bob’s ability to speak was on par with Mumbles Favilla at his best late in the day. Nice work Gordon.

  5. Gold Swish, fantastic memories of the football and Adelaide icons, you mesh them together seamlessly into what could be real recollections I can practically taste. If it weren’t for the fact I know I was too drunk to leave college most of that year I would almost believe I had been there at the time. I can really see how the power of suggestion might play a role in wrongful convictions.
    Everyone knows nice guys finish last, with 9 flags though I must have been a massive prick!. I apologise unreservedly.
    Keep up the great work

  6. Ahhhh… the Glenelg revolving (substitute a “t” for the 2nd “v”) restaurant. What a coup that was for SA when it was built! On the few occasions when it actually operated and wasn’t broken down, one could enjoy magnificent views of the Adelaide Hills and then the Glenelg foreshore without having to move a muscle. Pity about the food though, it was universally dreadful.

  7. Diggers says:

    Good stuff Gordon. The lyrics of the National Anthem are brilliant. I can see, that with minor melodic adaptations, they could be turned into an effective football supporters’ chant.

  8. Mark 'Swish' Schwerdt says:

    Thanks everyone.

    6% – where are *you* now?

    Mickey – Bob had the market cornered when it came to leather jacketed Half Case Warehouse owners

    ‘Book – yeah

    Daddsy – I wish I was in Adelaide some Saturday arvos

    Jerk – your legendary status is bona fide, but what do you mean *must have been* as if it is past tense?

    Jim – I went there once, I too never returned

    Diggers – Gordon should’ve followed the 3Res as well, but he was a bit mean to your brothers in his Round 9 report.

  9. wonderful account of a bygone era Gordon.

    the good news is tho , the Buffalo is trading once again apparently!

  10. rabid dog says:

    Laughed out loud at this one:
    “I got lost trying to find Fark Park, thinking that Hanson Road was near the Chick’s Charcoal Chicken Place.”
    Absolute classic.

    PS – is the shop still there? I’ll check it out on my next drive nroth of Regency Road.

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